Been trippin on what it is to be a daughter...especially since nowadays talking with my mom feels like throwing words into a blender...This is the time when I get to know my mother as a human being, as her own person, while remembering that looking at her is looking at me also. Right now there's a smoke screen between me and my momma - gotta take it down and allow us to see each other. I think the problem lies in my hunch that my mom doesn't see the smoke screen, while I do.
At the same time, I see her in pain and I think of mother earth, who is also in pain. Human beings do disgusting things to her and to each other. We are the spoiled kids of the animal kingdom. Recognize she is in pain, and give her love. Love is all she needs. My mother, and mother earth.
Today I reorganize my living space, discard the shit I'm not using, remodeling my room. It's my own therapy. I've been needing this change for a long time, and the hardest part is letting go. But I'm doing it. An effort for peace of mind.
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