Poison

I write because that's the only way I listen to myself when no one hears me. .
Today I close a chapter of my life...don't know which chapter that is at the moment but I'm sure I'll know once I live a few more years.

My heart, my stomach, my brain, my self are not well.
I made really stupid decisions again yesterday and hurt a lot of people I care about..
I am blessed to say no  one is physically hurt, but my own pain is too heavy to handle at the moment.

So much things to say, and all I can focus on is that one person who shouldn't have seen me do whatever I was doing. A blossoming friendship and love - is poisoned. What the fuck was I thinking?

That was the last straw. That's it.

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I now know the difference between people who love me and people who just want to cop my energy. I'm done. The universe keeps protecting me from absolute horrible things happening to me for a reason and it's time for me to wake the fuck up and stop playing. I trust in my purpose to creatively restructure and bring power to those who still don't believe they got it.

I haven't lost shit...in fact i'm gaining everything. What's up world.